were can i go when i need to cry and no one need to see my tears. Were can i hide the way i feel, so i can pick some later time to tell them what i hear. My heart melts with sorrw as i remeber the temperl state of this place. I refuse to give into this sadness We will perserver. Hope is in the unknowing for my God controls even the msysters beyond the seen. Every matter works to his plan all is in his hand. All that has been asked of me is to bring it to him trusting he knows what he has set in motion before my first breath. Though this i know it still does not take the sting of my present moment away. I will place my heart in his hand and hold on to the fact that He has lead me out of darkness time and time again. My faith comes from experance not a fairytale i follow blindly. Though I am still at a loss for a quiet private place to shed my tears. I cry in side my self and smile as if my life were not fracsured and fadeing into questions that i can not answer. To act as if it is all okay knowing that in the end it all go's the way that is best even if i cant see it at the time i am told that its come to what it has.
I have to share my fear i have tell of my worries and hurt i have to give away this sorrow so i don't carry it to my end. I am lonley with out you here i cannot be jealous cause i know you need each one of us to tow our on portation of the burdon. I do how ever wish that i had mine and his. i feel i am his better and still i can not let such ideas dilute the fact that he is special in his own way doing and completing task that i can not even begin. He has a purpose as i have mine, together seperate we are the comfort and peace that helps you stand and walk in this mist of whats going on. I share this cause it says what i want to say but again words that are not meant for you to read.
This is a quiet place along my path a place i find repose in knowing that when i live i have once again left being okay.
I am blessed to have you share your life with me.
